Tantra saved my marriage! I'm not kidding! If it wasn't for this esoteric sacred practice, I'm not sure where I would be, where WE would be.
Allow me to give you a little background. The first two years of the relationship were significant. The spark was there, and my pussy got wet on command, I was in total bliss. Year 3 not so much, I lost the sparkle and searched for something I didn't know I needed. I decided to step outside of my partnership in search for this unknown "thing." I knew it had something to do with stamina, as my husband would sometimes finish in five minutes. It also had to do with my orgasm, because he never made it a priority. But even with those thoughts and feelings, I wasn't quite sure how to communicate my needs to him. So I search tinder for eligible suitors, and I find one. The first time it was magical, it was that firework feeling that you get when you fuck someone new for the first time. My pussy was wetter than a faucet, and I was down for his oversized penis. The second time, the spark dwindled a bit, and by the third time, I didn't want shit to do with this guy. I learned at that moment that men, in general, don't prioritize their partner's pleasure.
I'm not too sure why it took me 26 years to realize this, as I could count on one hand how many times I've orgasmed from a male partner. So, since most men had this issue, I decided to take a minute, sit with myself, and learn a little about my body. I needed to learn so I could tell my partner how I needed/wanted to be pleased. That's where tantra came in. A tantric massage is a physical act of touch that aims to enlighten those interacting in it, through harnessing sexual energy in the body. I use to frequent massage parlors (Asian ones to be specific). They would massage me in a very sensual way. They would run their hands up and down my ass crack and massage my breasts without me asking. When I would leave, my pussy would be soaked, wishing they would have touched a little lower. Here's my aha moment. I love touch! Touch gets me wetter than any pussy licking, or penis stroke could ever. I was finally able to tell my husband what I needed from him confidently. I needed to be touched, and I didn't want to give him anything in return.
My husband and I had our very first Tantric Sex Ritual, and it was terrific. I set up the intentional space in our den. I smoked out the room with sage before he came home. I also had a natural aromatherapy candlelit, along with lavender and eucalyptus in the diffuser. I had an intentional shower, put on sexy lingerie, and did some yoga/meditation before arriving as well. My mental state was completely relaxed, and the day was washed away. I started the ritual with the Tibetan Bowl Sound Healing station on Pandora. I used sage while walking around him, chanting the mantra YUM. I set the intentions for our ritual out loud by saying, "Universe, please allow our spirits to connect. Please let us see one another in our purest form, and please allow our souls to become one. Any judgment or envy from outside sources will be non-existent during our time together."
I then cradled him. I rubbed lavender on his chest, and he did the same to mine. We then touched palms, and the eye gazed for about 5 minutes. I then cradled him closer, placing my bottom on top of his rock hard penis. We hugged tightly for another 5 minutes. We moved into a very passionate kiss, which lasted another 5 minutes. My pussy was dripping wet at this point, so I fell back and allowed him to devour my pussy. We then made love for another 15 minutes and ended with no orgasm on either side. We were content, as we both went in with no expectations. We enjoyed the pleasure and didn't force anything that didn't happen naturally. We both left fulfilled and connected to one another's energy.
This, to me, is real intimacy, necessary for the longevity of a partnership. In my tantric practice, I bring passion, as I am so passionate about it and everything that comes with it. Diving deep into this practice, helped my partner whom was never taught on how to give pleasure, worship my body. Something he had never done before. It's taught me how to worship my own body. How to reconnect with my being, and be totally present and mindful in the moment. It's taught me how to ditch the pornography, and focus solely on the pleasure I'm receiving RIGHT NOW. If you lack intimacy, or your pleasure isn't prioritized. Come see me. I am happy to share space.